Let's talk about motherhood

I need to devote a post to this, because it needs to be documented in my blogosphere history. Being a mom.

To borrow and paraphrase a line from Marley & Me...

"Why didn't anyone tell me us it would be this hard?"
"The thing is, I feel like people did tell us, we just didn't listen."

Preach.

Being a mom is exponentially harder than I thought. And not in a glamorous, easy, pretty, charming way. But in a...I'm more tired than I ever thought I could possibly be way. I've done my hair more than air drying and a ponytail ONCE in nine weeks way. My back aches from swaying and holding an ever-growing baby way. My days (followed by limited sleep nights) start around 5:00am way. Sometimes it's not fun and I resent my husband because he gets to do so much "fun stuff"...while, when he watches the baby, it's so I can clean the bathroom or stuff diapers or take a shower. I no longer have unlimited time to bake, be crafty, prepare supper for the next day. All of these things...I thought I would be able to manage them right away. That I would be the exception to new moms. That I would have it under control - be able to suck up the sleep deprivation and function just like I used to.

And then March 23 came and reality slapped me in the face.

I've never cried from fatigue until my second night in the hospital. The horrible, cruel thing about motherhood is that you don't enter into it fresh and ready to go. You enter into it (in my case, at least), exhausted from a super uncomfortable pregnancy, and after what's literally called LABORING for, most likely no less than 12 hours. Then they throw a child at you and say, "Congratulations on your massive fatigue! Now take care of this tiny human!" I never knew how tired I would be. Never.

All of that said...being a mom is absolutely, without a doubt the coolest thing ever. Even with the interrupted sleep, poop diapers, unbelievable fatigue and disrupted schedule. It's teaching me the meaning of sacrifice. I thought I knew what it was to sacrifice for someone you love. I didn't know. I had no idea. But now I do.

And this face...makes it all so, so, so incredibly worth it.

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